Here comes August again

Have you ever think of suicide? I do. 

Kalau boleh sekarang ni saya nak peluk mak kuat-kuat pastu nangis kat mak. I need mak. But when I call her, I won't be able to tell her what's wrong. I'm just so sick of letting her down again and again. Stressed out. Just want to hear my parents saying "I'm proud of you" to me. So bad. I never make them proud. Not even once. I always failed them. Always. 

Abah used to say that I never do anything to make an improvement in life. He didn't know. He never know. I really did. I tried. I failed. I guess failing is what I do best. No matter how much I tried. 

Here comes the Niagara Falls, or whatever they called it. 

 Happy August everybody. Celebrating August w tears. Yeah.

*P/s: I'm truly sorry for the post, Abah. I know you wouldn't like this. :/